God's little "Co-inkyidinks"

This morning I was asked to lead our MOPS (Mothers of PreSchoolers) discussions group as the regular leader was out of town. I am learning something very slowly in this life, and that is how to say my son's favorite word: "NO!" However, because this was a one-time deal and because I was not being asked to commit for the rest of the year, I said "YES!"

I have only been a part of this particular MOPS group since October and since that time have only been able to make 3 meetings. Hence, I do not know very many people yet, but most people there know my story of Trenton as that is the reason we had to miss so many meetings.

I noticed that my group had a few new faces, and after talking a bit, I realized that several moms were new. So, we began with a basic introduction of the members of the small group (7 girls in all). I started by telling about my 3 kids and very briefly about Trenton's early birth and 2 brain surgeries, the reason he was in my arms as opposed to in the childcare area.

Then we got around to a new girl. She introduced herself and told about her 7 month old son, who also had had 2 major surgeries when he was born for "a disease that you probably have never heard of." Turns out, this is the same rare genetic disease that my sister and I both were born with, and have had a life of surgeries to correct the issue!

Her mouth flung open and I almost laughed out loud! This disease is pretty rare and unless you have known someone with it, you have never heard of it.

Of course after our discussion time was over with, we ran to each other and began sharing our stories. She told me about her son, I told her about my experience with the disease, although my first operation was over 20 years ago! Thus, the experiences were different. But, not only did we connect for that reason, but because we are moms to special needs babies.

Unless you have one, you have no idea what life is like with a fragile, tiny baby. Unless you have had one, you do not know what it is to truly fear for the life of you baby. You do not know what constant doctors appointments are like, therapies, grim prognoses, huge question marks over the future of your child etc. are like. You do not know what it is like to try to maintain a normal life, while trying to protect your little one. Sometimes, you feel so very very alone and very inadequately chosen to mother this baby.

Now, I am not underestimating the power of empathy and love by wonderful friends who do not understand from experience, but do understand pain and fear. I have had MANY of those relationships and my life would not be the same without them. But, when another mother can truly understand what you are going through or have been through, it is such a relief to realize that your fears are valid and that you are not alone.

Although we think that we plan things.....like choosing small groups for MOPS, it is really God who places people in our lives for a purpose. God ordains relationships and circumstances to work out as He sees fit. Sometimes it is absolutely unfathomable how things just seem to "work out." Sometimes it is not always easy and God's ways are not the ways we would have chosen.

But I for one, am very glad and blessed to have had another "coincidence" occur in my life to show me that God is in control and He chooses our paths!